The GSFWC gave me their thoughts last night. At the time I felt defeated and thought it best (and it still might be) to just leave it for a while. The thing that hit me hardest was being told it was 'first drafty' when it is in it's 8th incarnation by now. Pretty much all my feedback has had some issue with McEwan or the lack of him, while that was deliberate it clearly wasn't such a good plan,fortunately this should be straightforward to fix. There are of course detailed 'nitpicks' which I have had a blind spot to - in fact largely there does seem to be a matter of me thinking I've written something but it not actually being there! Although a quick check this morning still sees some of it there, just maybe not where it is expected/supposed to be.
Nonetheless by the time I'd gotten home and my mind had started chewing it over I had gone from defeat to anger. Not at my critics but at myself for being so...amateur. But this anger is what makes me determined to pick myself up, look afresh with these comments in mind and try all over again.
For a start I wanted to look at what the Watchers would do in the real world, could they be re-integrated? For some reason I kill most of them off within minutes of them being in the plot. Not much point throwing away the 'realist' approach if I'm then going to throw my 'fantasy' away moments after introducing it. I think I have had two stories fighting with one another, along with a greater ambition than my ability at this stage. Which is not to say I think my creation is poor - it just needs more polishing to get that diamond shining through.
Despite my achievements this really is the hardest thing I've done, and I'm going to get that reward at the end.
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